John Edwards is a douchbag...who didn't know that?

Rule #1 Don't Cheat.

Rule #2 if you cheat, don't get caught.

Rule #3 if you get caught, deny everything.

Rule #4 If there's DNA or a paternity test that you can't get away from, make sure you won the election because there's one rule that overrides all other rules: If your wife is the First Lady it doesn't matter what you do as long as she still gets to be First Lady.